Wow, Its About Time for an Update!

Hello Friends!  After blowing the proverbial layer of dust off my blog, I figured it was about time to update.  To be fair, I haven't had much to update about but, I did have an appointment this last week and now have something to write about.

The appointment was on the 28th.  Chris and I got ready and got there on time only to find out the hospital appointment was at 1:00 but, Fiona (the nurse) was expecting us at 12:30.  She wasn't too happy that we were late but saw us anyway.

She started out by giving us all the test results.  We went over mine first, and they were all fine.  Lets see… Immune to Rubella, no Diabetes, no hormone imbalances, and ovaries full of perfectly healthy eggs.  That was a huge relief to start with.  She told us Chris’ sample results which were more than fine, they were excellent – so he wont have to do anymore samples, she seems content that any infertility isn't on his part.  They usually do 2 samples from the male and if they are alright then they leave it at that.

This was good news, nothing is obviously wrong – but it is bad news too.  If nothing is wrong why am I not getting pregnant???  It means more tests and no easy answers.

She said Dr. R looked through my notes and said, aside from the fertility stuff, that it looked like I was anaemic (thanks to the celiac) and also had a syndrome called Gilbert Syndrome.  Fiona then proceeded to tell me that she didn't know what it was.  My mind started racing, thinking – I cant do it, I cant have another health problem. 

Fiona then proceeded to tell me what our next steps are.  She said that they want to do some exploratory surgery.  Dr. R said there was some fluid in my uterus and that could be a sign of a blocked Fallopian tubes.  Then she said what I figured she would – Jamie, you need to loose weight before we do the surgery. 

This is a sore spot to me – I know that I need to loose weight, but, I don't think my weight should be a roadblock to surgery.  The pressure put upon me by Fiona is immense and the pressure put upon me by myself is even bigger. 

My next appointment is more than a month away.  I have a big chunk of time to loose some weight to let Fiona know that I am serious.  I do want a baby, but more than that I want less painful periods and to feel healthy.  I don't want Fiona to give up on me and I don't want my weight to be the reason I cant be a mother, Chris cant be a Father and just as importantly my parents cant be Grandparents (that is a whole other post in itself).

Fiona referred me and Chris to a specialized weight loss clinic that has supposedly produced great results, that will be helpful.

I got home from the appointment and immediately looked online for Gilberts Syndrome.  It is a non-health threatening syndrome where your liver doesn't take the yellow out of your blood, so apparently sometimes if I am stressed, dehydrated, or ill I will look a little yellow.  What a blessing that it is nothing serious.

So now we wait and I work.  I work on finding the motivation to loose some weight, to start on my gluten free diet, and to make my health a priority.  Hopefully that will lead to more answers and some solutions.  Hopefully.

The Rope Just Got A Bit Longer

So...

Once I woke up on Wednesday I made the phone call to Dr. R's secretary. I explained to her that I knew that I hadn't worked with Dr. R before, but I was told to have Chris' test results sent to him by my GP and I was interested in the results and also making an appointment as soon as possible with Dr. R. I was quickly told that 1. They don't tell test results over the phone, and 2. I would have to go to my GP to give me another referral because the one I got last MAY had expired (they didn't have any record of the one from October that shouldn't have expired).

I hung up the phone and got right back onto the phone to my GP. I told the receptionist that I needed to speak to Dr. M as soon as possible about getting another referral. She told me she'd leave a message on the computer for her but she didn't know when Dr. M would get back to me.

I had to run off and take my driving test and so I crossed my fingers that Dr. M would call and Chris could speak to her (he is more persuasive).

Later that day when I called Chris he said that she did call back, he explained the situation and what the secretary said. At this point Dr. M got very frustrated (at Dr. R) and said the referral should be valid still and that she would call the secretary herself and get an appointment.

Good news! I am lucky that I have a GP that is on my side but, why wouldn't she be? She has been struggling with medical professionals for us since May - she must be frustrated with them wasting her time as well.

So now we are back to waiting for an appointment - I think next week I will be making a call to Dr. R to make sure that there is something in the works. I'll get in there to see him if its the last thing I do!

The Waiting Game... Not Such A Fun Game.

Hello! I know it has been a while since I wrote, and I don't have an excuse for it except that I've had a very hard few weeks.

I thought an update would be in order.

We took the sample in Friday the 20th with no incident (even had time to stop at McDonalds). I kept it in my pocket, as suggested, to keep it warm and once we got to the hospital I thought we'd be in for a wait because we had to make an appointment (and its the NHS). Chris' sister came in with us so she didn't have to wait in the car. After trekking to the other end of the hospital we came to the Pathology Department window, the man took the sample from us, shook it around a bit, asked us some slightly personal questions (keeping in mind Chris' sister was there so we were trying to be as discreet as possible), and then said, "okay you'll have the results in about 3 weeks!" We said thank you and went home.

I guess at the first of this process I would have been very impatient about the results, but this time I haven't even noticed the wait. Yesterday I said to Chris, "Why don't you call the hospital at the off chance that the sample results are in." He did and we were told to call our regular doctor.

Chris called the office and the receptionist answered the phone. Usually, when there are test results the doctor gets them and then types on the screen what to tell the patient the results are. Surprisingly when Chris called the test results were in (shocking!) but the receptionist said she couldn't tell us the results and we'd have to make an appointment with the regular doctor to discuss things further.

Suddenly my complacency turned to anxiety with questions shooting through my mind about why the doctor needed to talk to us. The way the surgery (doctors office) works here is if we want an appointment with the doctor pre-bookable appointments are usually a 2 week wait, but they leave several appointments available each day at first come first serve - you have to call right at 8:00 in the morning and hope there are places left, so that is what we have to do for Monday.

Last night I said to Chris, "are you worried about the results?" he said, "no, they are what they are - no use worrying about them, nothing you can do." Do I wish he was a little more passionate about it? Yes! Do I wish he was kept up at night with thoughts of the future like I am? Yes! But, am I so grateful that I have a husband who can stay calm and inject a sense of sanity into the situation? YES!

I know he's right - whatever the test results are, they are - no use worrying. We'll do what we can with the information given... says my rational mind...

But my louder, emotional mind is shouting at me, "This could put an end to your hopes!" and I cant get it to be quiet!