A New Start

Hello Internet! I know it has been a LONG time since I have updated this blog - but as part of my "coping" and my goal of writing more - I think this blog will get a little more attention.

Chris also occasionally adds to the blog so you can see things from his point of view.

The rule of this blog for me???

* No censoring! No matter what -- If you are reading this blog be prepared - I will complain, cry, and I wont hold things back. That is why it is a private blog - so I can be myself. Oh and by the way (MEN) I wont hold back on some of the more "girly" details - but rest assured I will ALWAYS give a warning!

On the same token, I would love to hear your comments and I would love for you to follow my rules... Dont worry about "stepping on eggshells" as to not to make me feel bad. Dont worry - I dont cry at the mention of a pregnancy (most the time).

Our journey so far?? Here is the timeline thus far:

May: Appt. in Kings Lynn, UK -- diagnosed with Uterine Cysts and put on a high dose of Progesterone (and EXTREME rollercoaster ride to follow) . Told to loose weight and come back for a follow up in October to discuss surgery.

August: Appt. with regular GP (Dr. M) she tells me she got the notes from the Kings Lynn doctor. She tells me the note says that he has diagnosed me with Ovarian Cysts on both sides. This contradicts what I was told during the appointment (on lots of levels - luckily Chris was there to back me up). This matters because they are waiting for surgery for me to loose weight and it is nearly impossible to loose weight with ovarian cysts. Also, Progesterone suppresses ovulation (thus preventing pregnancy) and shouldn't have been prescribed for me. I immediately request a different specialist. I go home and call the secretary of the Kings Lynn doctors and she proceeds to tell me I have no access to the ultrasound, medical records, and tells me NONE of her doctors would prescribe Progesterone for me! Tell everyone I know NOT to go to Kings Lynn!!!

September: Appt. at Peterborough Regional Hospital, UK with gynaecologist. He spends 5 minutes with me, no exam just talking, and says that it is cysts on my ovaries and that I need to see a fertility specialist. After A LOT of persuading and not being able to get the 2 differing diagnosis out of my mind he agrees to let me get another internal ultrasound.

September: Appt. at Edith Cavell Hospital in Peterborough, UK. Arrive with a FULL bladder ready for the horror that is the internal ultrasound just to find that even though I have an appointment there is no one available to do the ultrasound and I have to wait 2 hours OR come back, Chris had to work so I say I'll come back.

October: Appt. again at Edith Cavell, Chris had to work so I had to go it alone. Get ultrasound done (SHOCKING there was staff there!) - the tech says I have a large cyst on my right ovary and something, a mass of some sort, on the left side in my uterus. The tech says she'll forward my info to the gyno I saw and also Dr. M. Cry in the car, alone, afraid of what this ultrasound means.

November: Seeing Dr. M for another issue and mention the fertility, she says that Dr. R from Peterborough has contacted her and needs a full blood and hormone work up from me and also a "sample" from Chris until anything can be done.

December: Tested for Celiac Disease - positive result (a whole other blog but temporarily takes my focus off of the fertility).

January: I call to make an appt. to bring in Chris' sample to the hospital -- it all has to be perfectly timed (to the hour) -- no appointment available until the 28th of January - TO DROP OFF A SAMPLE!

So that is where we are. TONS of waiting and tons of appointments and we are no further ahead then we were nearly a year ago! The holidays were horrible as far as infertility goes and it gets worse and worse daily. I cant get away from it. Sometimes I feel fine - you know, the Lords time - but, I am only human and sometimes it gets to be too much. That is where I am now. I just need to share it with someone - thanks for letting me.