Hello Friends I didn't want to leave you hangin’ about the appointment yesterday so here is the update:
The appointment went really well yesterday. We got to the hospital on time (barely). I was weighted (AHHHHH) and measured and told so wait for the nurse to see me. I knew that I wouldn't be seeing the doctor today because my letter from the hospital told me that I would be meeting with the nurse for an hour appointment. I was really hesitant about this because I didn't think anything would be accomplished (what could a nurse tell me?). Chris and I were waiting and waiting and the nurse (called Fiona) came out of the office several times to tell me that she was reading my notes and would be with me as soon as possible. I was impressed immediately with her friendliness. After waiting for about a half an hour she ushered us into her office.
Once in her office we were greeted with walls full of pictures of babies, the light smell of roses, and calming classical music playing in the background. I was immediately calmed and filled with quiet confidence. It was a stark contrast to our appointment in Kings Lynn already. She told us that she had hundreds of questions to ask me and 50 to ask Chris.
She started asked me about my cycle and said that both the Dr.’s in Kings Lynn and Dr. M had put in the notes that I had irregular cycles but when she looked at my nearly 3 year record (yes I have kept meticulous track for nearly 3 years) she found that my cycle was just fine and that it was well within the parameters of a “normal” cycle.
She looked at my scan notes and said that I did have PCOS for sure because there was evidence of cysts on both sides of my ovaries. She says 1 in 6 women have cysts on their ovaries and that they only become a problem when the cysts stop ovulation, and for me they haven't, so the PCOS isn't the cause of the problems. She did see the mass in my uterus. She said she is fairly confident that is isn't a fibroid or a tumour or anything of that sort. She said that it isn't rare to have fluid in the back of the uterus after a cycle or it could show that the fallopian tubes are blocked (which would cause infertility). That will all be explored at a later date.
As far as “the sample” we were finally able to get some answers! I can honestly say that this was the source of a lot of my anxiety concerning the appointment. It was all good news. Fiona said that in the sample there were around 200 million little guys and that 70% were alive and that 5% were usable (normal is 8%). She said with the higher amount (his sample had well over the average) that the 5% was totally fine and that everything seemed alright. She told Chris he would have to do another sample because, unlike women, male fertility can change quite quickly so they like to have 2 samples to compare. His appointment to take it in is on the 8th of July. Hearing those results were a HUGE relief. Male Factor infertility is a lot harder to fix.
I continued to tell Fiona about my history. She was quite confused at the course of action that Kings Lynn took in my treatment. She said that they NEVER should have put me on the Provera, especially with my cycle. It makes me realize and, reaffirms that it was the right decision to find someone else besides Kings Lynn to help.
So the course of action now is:
Chris:
Sample on the 8th of July
Jamie:
Chlamydia screening
Blood test on days 21, 28, and 35 of my cycle (to see if I am, in fact, ovulating)
Blood tests for hormone levels (5 tests in all)
Blood test to see if I am Rubella Immune (important to know for pregnancy)
Blood test for Glucose and Lipids
I am really pleased at the course Fiona is taking things. I am glad that she is testing me for everything possible. She said because I have such painful periods that Endometriosis is definitely an option (especially since my sister has had it and it is hereditary) and possibly a check on my fallopian tubes.
She could tell how frustrated I was with the whole situation and was so supportive saying, “We’ll get to the bottom of it” and “We will figure out what’s wrong” several times during the appointment.
The appointment was nearly finished and then the subject that I KNEW was coming was brought up,
“Now we need to talk about your weight.”
She said that my weight was not an issue in my fertility because it wasn't stopping me from ovulating. She continued to tell us that the government does a confidential report each year about mother and infant deaths in childbirth. She says they have found that women who have a BMI over 40% are at increased risk for complications including stroke, high blood pressure, and death. That children born to mothers with that BMI are at increased risk for birth defects and death.
Fiona said that I had a BMI of 41% (no, I am not afraid to say it – ashamed, but not afraid) and asked if I was willing to take those risks, to go through everything and then loose the baby. Then she turned to Chris and asked if it was worth us getting pregnant right now if the end result was a paralyzed wife from stroke or worse. We agreed that it wasn't worth the risk. She gave me some options for weight loss (Weight Watchers and stuff like that). I make excuses and said we didn't have the money and she said, “Diapers cost more a week than a weekly membership – it is a matter of figuring out your priorities.” She also told us that in the meantime that we should NOT get pregnant and to use precautions. She said she was sure it sounded strange coming from a fertility clinic but that it wouldn't be safe to get pregnant right now.
Chris and I left the office, especially me, filled with hope and thankfulness that we finally seemed to find someone who is going to help. Fiona told us she’d get us her next appointment (end of July probably).
The appointment has left me with so many thoughts in my head about my desire to have a baby vs. my weight. I wasn't insulted or upset at how Fiona broached the subject. It was in such a concerned way and serious way that I knew it wasn't a personal attack or a way for the NHS to save money.
I know that my weight has gotten out of control and I always knew in my heart that I wouldn't want to get pregnant at this weight. So now where do I go from here? That is a good question. I think it is going to take a lot of commitment, because it isn't going to be easy – but, like my mom said last night, I need to imagine holding my little baby in my arms and it will make it all worth it.
Needless to say this blog, I am sure, will take on different form now that I know what I need to do about weight loss but also finally being able to get some answers.
As always, I am glad for the support and will ask for that support to continue as we take the next step in the journey.
