Brussels - Pros and Cons

Chris and I got back from a LONG (2 days but LONG) weekend trip to Brussels yesterday.  It was quite an eventful trip.  We took Chris' parents with us to split the driving, cost, and to just have some company.  Since so much happened this entry will be in the form of a list - Pros and Cons:
Cons:

*A Midnight leaving time - no sleep for over 24 hours, once we got there.
*No good food at the rest stop - no good food for over 24 hours, once we got there.
*Driving in Brussels where the speed limit was up to 90 mph sometimes, and a car that refused to go that fast!
*One hotel room that was ready for four tired adults to "wait it out" in - until after 15 minutes, I went down to the desk and asked for a 2 single bed room - to save everyone's sanity.
*A HIGHTLY rated, HIGHLY expensive hotel with HUGE let downs -- crap, really.
*FREEZING cold.
*The confusing subway system with scary, non-English speaking people... drunk men asking MIL (mother-in-law) for money or groups of rough teens ranting in French - are they going to push me in front of the tram?!?!?  Who knows!?!?
*RUDE people pushing past you like you are invisible.
*Crowds of people in a normally quite city.
*Chris getting his wallet stolen right out of his pocket as someone pushed into him - a walled with both bank cards in it, plus, all the money his parents gave us to split the cost of the trip.
*The panic that ensued trying  to find a police station in a country where NO ONE would speak in English to us and then walking back to the hotel to ask a very mean front desk employee where the police station was, and finding it was only 1/2 a block away from where the wallet was stolen.
*Spending 14.00 Euros to call the banks to cancel cards.
*Chris and me being treated like common criminals because we spoke English at the police station.
*Chris cutting his finger on a glass at Pizza Hut and the manager doing nothing but say, "I don't know what to do!" and giving him a band-aid.
*Finding out that the in-laws shower didn't work.
*Arguments, enough said!
*A horrible breakfast.
*Problems with the tyres all the way home.
*Walking around some french mall for ages trying to find out what to eat and not understanding enough French to order, finally ending up at a supermarket getting bread and cheese.
*Waiting for the train, getting some chicken dippers (against my better judgement - I am VERY picky with meat) and biting into a huge chunk of gristle, gagging so loud the entire restaurant heard and the rest of the trip Chris calling them "gristle dippers" and me still gagging at the mere mention of it. (It was funny too, quite a good laugh).
*Longer train journey for repairs.
*Being stopped at customs.
*Driving the whole way home - with, at times, 3 people telling me what lane to be in.
*Bloody feet (so much walking...)

Pros:

*Uh.... I get to visit Europe.
*Getting my passport stamped (the reason for the trip) - another year of driving in England.
*Vouchers so everything we buy at the rest stops is FREE!
*Buying motions sickness wrist bands (I suffer SO bad from motion sickness) and - THEY WORKED!!
*Parking the car in the train and a smooth, relaxing ride.
*No migraines or headaches all weekend.
*Not much traffic in France and Belgium (2:00 AM) so I could go 20 miles under the speed limit and feel more comfortable.
*Driving on the right side of the road.
*Hotel was easy to find and a straight road 99% of the time.
*Nice Christmas decorations around town.
*The passports weren't in Chris' wallet - best pro EVER.
*Belgian chocolate.
*An earlier train home (5:30 PM instead of 11:30 PM)
*No traffic on the way home.
*Good company, most of the time :).
*Belly laughs with MIL and Chris.
*Going to the beach at Dunkirk, feeing the history and actually getting Chris to come to the water with me and then on the way back him helping me pick up shells.
*Arguments between Chris and I stopped after the wallet incident.
*New adventures!!!
*The whole trip back taking only about 5 hours!  Can you believe I live only 3 hours from Europe?!?

So, there you go.  Sorry it is long.  The best pro about the whole thing was my new appreciation for England and my little apartment here that I complain about so much.
I know in an earlier post I was going to do the "12 Days of Christmas" in pictures, but that was spoiled by the trip.  I will do a week leading to Christmas though and hopefully that will be alright.  There are new pictures from the trip (not many) up in the photo album.
Coming up in the next few days will be blogging about the continuing disaster of the stolen wallet AND my new diagnosis of Celiac's Disease.  I will also hopefully be putting up some posts about Christmas in England and some pictures or updates about our upcoming trip to London (that is, if the dirty pick-pockets don't spend ALL our money).
Also, in the new year I will be picking up again on the infertility blog - if you are interested in reading it, please send me a message with your email address - thanks!!

'Tis the Season... and all that Jazz

It has been way too long since I have written, I have had quite a bit to say but tend not to write when I am feeling homesick or depressed because if I did that my blog would be quite boring and would end up being a "pity party" and no one wants to read that -- do they?
It has been a very long hard month (November) here in the Flattley household.  It first started with some family problems that, at the time. was soul destroying and all consuming.  Luckily, problems have been hashed out, apologies have been made, and relationships have been mended.  Right on top of those problems Chris and I were continually hurt by people we considered friends.  We are attending church in a branch that goes by its own rules and accepts dishonesty more than honesty, gossip more than truth, and ignorance rather than acceptance.  We have 5 primary children in the branch but it feels just like dealing with lots of children.  Never in my life have I been somewhere (school, work, family or otherwise) where I have felt so unimportant, bullied, or so ostracised.  This, unfortunately seems to be getting worse, not better and although there are some genuinely lovely people in the branch - as in life, the bad outweighs the good a lot of the time and Chris and I are praying for a miracle i.e. dissolving the branch.  All of this, coupled with a bit of a cancer scare (nothing dramatic, just a visit to a specialist who said nothing was wrong, the result of a concerned GP), a very lonely Thanksgiving, some missed opportunities, and a dear husband who forgot an important date - November has not been my month.
So now here is December and after all that I am supposed to be feeling the "Christmas Spirit", which usually comes quite quickly (in the middle of November) for me but seems to be seeping in slowly but surely - enough, anyway, to get our pathetic 4 ft. tree put up and a few decorations up.  This Christmas is difficult, mostly because I am comparing it to last Christmas when we were home in Utah.  This, hopefully, will be our last Christmas in England (living here anyway) so I am trying to be positive. 
Our town is lit up with lights (pictures to come) and it is absolutely FREEZING.  We've even had some snow...
This month we are planning a trip to London, it is lovely there at Christmas and helps me re-connect with Chris, since that is where we spent so much time when we were dating.  In a few weeks we are driving (with Chris' parents) into Belgium to spend a weekend there.  I am really looking forward to it. 
We do have a lot of goals for the new year, one of which is to travel a lot more.  With £1.00 flights all over Europe it should be a good goal and we are now making every Friday our driving day -- driving to places all over the country that we've not seen.  I am trying to be positive and figure since we are here we should take advantage.
So this is me trying to forget the past month but, I find it quite difficult.  I am sure a lot of your have had to deal with tough family or church situations, being away from home or being depressed - what has made you feel better or forget past wrongs??
I will be posting more and plan on doing the 12 days of Christmas through photos so look for that.
OH! By the way.... if you are wanting a good, by good I mean amazing, online radio to listen to with never-ending choices for Christmas go to http://www.accuradio.com/ -- I usually listen to the broadway station, but switch over for Christmas (although, the do have a Broadway Christmas so I get two-in-one).

One Year Older

Hello Internet.  I hope you all had a very good Halloween. 
As for me, it was my birthday.  Now, I have not had too much good luck with birthdays so needless to say I didn't hold out hope for this one.  I kept joking to Chris that I was just going to sleep until Saturday morning.  He didn't let me - I awoke to a lovely breakfast in bed (made by Chris).  He seemed more excited about me opening my presents than I did.  When I did open them I was pleasantly surprised by a CD that I had really wanted, one CD that I already had (its okay, he didn't know), and a lovely silver heart necklace.  He did very good.  I also got some clothes from my mom back at home.  I got a great phone call from my mom and dad, which topped of the great morning.   I was so glad that they called even though it is hard to be away from home for me, but it gets especially hard on birthdays and holidays.  I just relaxed before we were supposed to go out to dinner - I had a bit of a set back of fleeting depression - but after I read what Chris wrote about me on his blog, there was no way I could be depressed and we got ready and went to Chili's.  This is a special treat because it tends to be kind of expensive and it is in Cambridge - but it was a special day so we went.  It was such good food!!  Then we came home and relaxed.  It was a low-key but absolutely lovely birthday.
The weekend was made even better by my Saturday.  Some Americans that I know had arranged to go to the base and they were kind enough to invite me to go along.  One of the girls is called Jenni.  She has a husband in the military and she was the one with access to the base.  She is such a fun person, not only does she have 6 kids, but, she is on her 3rd book.  She is re-writing all of Jane Austins books for teens.   The other girl is called Natalie and she is in a similar situation as me.  She married an Englishman and moved from California to be here.  She and I have a lot in common and it is very good to have someone who knows how I feel.  We went to the base and we were in HEAVEN!!  We got to eat at Taco Bell, went to a mall type place and got some holiday candles and then we went to the grocery store on base, at this point I thought I'd died and gone to heaven... isles and isles of American food.  If I tried really hard I could almost forget I was in England.  I was surrounded by American accents and using dollars!!   Jenni shared her groceries with us. I got things that I had been craving for a year.  She also was so kind to get me a Yankee Candle with an amazing top for Christmas, as a birthday present.  We shopped and shopped and looked and looked.  Not only was the experience so fun, but I made some great friendships with Jenni and Natalie.  When I was wavering if I should go or not, my wise mother said -- you've been craving friends and Taco Bell, you never know what a blessing this might be.  And she was so right.  Now I have an invite to Bunco on the base every month were I get to meet more Americans, but more importantly friends.
This weekend has been unforgettable.  There are few times, especially as of late, that happiness has been a part of my life.  Chris makes me happy but that is the extent of it.  It just goes to show how the little things mean so much.  I am thankful for Chris for making such an effort this year for my birthday - he knows how difficult its been for me.
I have so many plans for this new year... I like to try to make Birthday Resolutions and I have lots of goals for the coming year - and hopefully most of them will take place in America.  I just have to keep telling myself -- STAY POSITIVE - after all, I may be on the upper end of it, but I am still in my 20's!! 

Human Nature

Hello Internet.  It has been a while since I wrote, and I do have a lot on my mind.  Lately I have been taking care of a poorly husband who has had some bad luck with the dentist.  After 3 visits in the space of a week (one emergency visit), he is now minus 2 teeth, 1 abscess, and probably one stomach lining from all the pain killers - through fevers, infection and sever pain (agony as he says) he now seems well on his way to heath (thank goodness!) .  Funny thing is, he is waiting for another appointment to get one of his wisdom teeth out that has fused to the bone and we can start this whole song and dance again.  But, that isn't the reason of the post.
The other day in Sunday School the teacher said that we are mean to others because, "it is human nature."  I don't think I quite agree with that.  I don't think we are sent down to earth with a human tendency to be mean to others... I think it is taught or learned.  But is it? 
Today I was babysitting 2 year old twins.  Their parents are both doctors and they have never watched TV at home because there isn't one for them to watch.  They are very well cared for and very sheltered.  But, they can be mean to each other.  Teasing and bullying - that wasn't taught... so is it human nature??
The other day at the dentist Chris and I were waiting in the room next to some large floor to ceiling windows and I heard a loud thump.  As I turned to look I saw that an old man had fallen to the ground and wasn't moving.  My reaction - to jump out of my seat and go see if he was alright, luckily a man walking past got there before me and was taking care of him.  The thing that SHOCKED me was that the second he fell down a woman saw the whole thing and actually stepped over him and walked on by, not checking to see if he was alright - just walked by.  So is that human nature?  
So what is human nature when it comes to how we treat others?  Are we born with the ability to walk past an injured person -- does it start to show itself when we are children?  Or, is it our environment, our lives or our situation that feeds that attitude? 
What do you think?

Pictures Anyone?

I realized this weekend that I had quite a few pictures saved on Chris' phone so if you look in the pictures on the side you'll find them.

England 101

Hello Internet Class... today we are going to do a short lesson to learn some of the oddities of England.
-  In England they don't say - "Things are heating up!" they say, "Things are hotting up!"
- In England they don't keep Mayo or Eggs in the fridge, but in the cupboard.
-  In England it is common etiquette to offer your guests a drink - ALWAYS!
-  Here in England one of the most traditional foods is called a Prawn Cocktail.  It is usually served in a wine glass and all it is, is shrimp and fry sauce.
-  In England, after 8 at night, it is completely common to see full frontal male and female nudity.
-  In England you give people cards for everything - birthday, anniversary, passing driving tests, passing school tests, - EVERYTHING (it gets VERY expensive)
-  In England you can get a few pills or medications from the regular store, but for anything else you have to go to the chemist and they are only open til 6:30 at night, after that you are out of luck.
-  In England a lot of the toilets have two buttons to push to flush one light and one heavy.
-  An English keyboard has different places for the symbols than an American one. 
-  In England your washing machines are in the kitchen.
- In England the traffic lights turn red, and then when it is time to go they are red and yellow (that means you can go) and then green.

I've Been Tagged (a.k.a. A Good Reason to Write)

I know it has been ages since I have written.  I think when I feel sad, I don't like to write because, although it is highly helpful for me to write, I hate to have people think I am struggling or bore people with my complaints - of a life I picked.  But I just exercised (SHOCK) and am feeling like I should get something done.  Since I have a highly efficient husband (all the housework is done, thanks to him) this what I have to do, and to tell the truth I do miss it.
Since I check my friends blogs every night I noticed that Alison tagged me and, in a way, so did Amanda - so I will kill 2 birds with one stone - Sorry if it is boring, at least I am writing something... right?
Anyway, back to the matter at hand:
6 RANDOM FACTS:
1.  I love brushing my teeth, and could do it for a while except the very annoying fact that I gag whenever I get the tooth brush near my tongue or even just think about it touching my tongue. 
2.  I cant have a drink of water in a cup or bottle that has had juice or soda in it.  Even if it is washed I can taste the flavour and cant drink the water.
3.Whenever I go to a grocery store I have to go up and down every single isle, the same way, every time.  It drives Chris crazy, but I think this comes from when I used to go shopping with my mom she went up and down every isle - I do skip the pet food isle (most the time).
4. Sometimes when I play the piano at church for Sacrament meeting - I speed it up just to throw the congragation off and to get the song over with.
5.  As I have gotten older and the longer I live in England the more I hate meat.  I rarely eat it, and I cant stand to handle it at all.
6.  Every morning I check the same web sites, in the same order and NEVER deviate from it.
BLAST FROM THE PAST:
1.Did you date anyone from your high school? Yes I did, and after high school for WAY too long!
2.What kind of car did you drive? My parents lovely Suburban (that I treated like my own) and my Honda Civic.
3.Were you a party animal? No.
4.Were you considered a flirt? I didn't think so, but, some people say I was.
5.Were you in a band, orchestra, or choir? Madrigals for 2 years.
6.Where you a nerd? I don't think so.
7.Were you on any Varsity teams? Nope.
8.Did you ever get suspended or expelled?  No, me in trouble?? Never!
9.Can you sing the Fight Song? Nope but I can sing our school song.                                             10.Who was your favourite teacher? Mr. Moore
11.Where did you sit for lunch? "our table" as a Sophomore, and in the Drama and Choir rooms the other years.
12.What was your schools full name? Cyprus High School
13.What was your mascot? A Pirate
14.If you could go back again would you? Nope, it was a good time and made good memories, but would NEVER go back.
15.What do you remember about graduation? Nothing much at all, am I getting old??
16.Where did you go on your Senior Skip Day? I am sure I did, I was MIA most of my Senior year.
17.Were you in any clubs? Madrigals and I think that is all.
18.Have you gained any weight since then? Yes :(                                                                     19.Who was your Prom dates? I didn't go to Prom, boys choice - I wish I had though - oh well...
20.Are you planning on going to your 10 year reunion?  Doubtful...

On Getting Older and other Mindless Chatter...

Things here at the Flattley house are boring and horrible beginning of the week.  The weather isn't playing fair at all and FINALLY today for a few minutes here and there the sun has decided to stop making us miserable and showing itself - accompanied with high winds - but sun, none the less.
Everytime the seasons begin to change here it takes quite a while to get used to it.  My mind tells me that Autumn brings with it cooler weather and quite a bit of rain but, I tend to forget and then when it comes it takes quite a while to get used to.
Today I found them, hiding , mixed in with the others and EXTREMELY defiant.  I am only 27 but after doing my research I have found that they happen because of stress and genetics - but give me a break TWO gray eyebrow hairs?!?!!?  TWO on the same eyebrow at the same time?  If stress does this to me, makes me older, I will have a walker by the time I get back to America!  Please someone else my age tell me you've found some too... please...
Chris and I are starting on his Visa this week.... America here we come, we have a place to live (thanks to an amazing friend) but we will also need a car (any will do - have you seen our old car Bella??) and we, of course will need jobs...  keep your eyes and ears open for me please :)
On a serious note:  Chris and I are struggling to stay above water here in England - we are both looking for jobs and searching for a solution but any thoughts or prayers from our "support" back home would be very appreciated!

On a much, much happier, lovely note:
Today is one of my favourite peoples birthdays... my dad. 
This last time at the temple I was taking pictures of the lovely flowers and I stopped and turned to Chris and said, "taking pictures of flowers?  I am turning into my dad!"
And then I thought to myself, I cant think of many other people I would love to be like.
I miss him like crazy - his influence on my life for good cannot be measured.  When they speak of "spiritual giants" he is mine, and many other peoples as well.
He is a good example to so many around him and I cant wait to get home and just spend time with him...
I love you dad!!!  Happy Birthday!!!
P.S. Dad, your oldest daughter is getting gray hair... you're not old enough to have a daughter with gray hair... are you???

I Wasn't Slacking, I was Away

Last Monday morning Chris and I were sitting in the front room and I turned to him and said, "Should we go to the temple?" and before I finished my sentence he was on the phone with the accommodation centre and booked us a room for the evening.  Here in England the closest temple is 2 1/2 hours away so they offer an accommodation centre so that you can spend the night instead of having to drive back and forth in one day (although LOTS of people do it in one day).  The accommodation centres are really nice and you have a choice of several different kinds of rooms with kitchens, bathrooms, single beds, double beds - really anything.  We were out of March within an hour and on our way down.  It is a hard drive to me because I am so used to single lane roads with slow speed limits not motorways with a national speed limits of 70 mph.  On the way to the temple we have to go over a HUGE bridge.  If anyone knows me they know that bridges are my #1 fear... here are a few pictures...


If you could see my little finger you could see that it was white because I was gripping so hard, and yes I was only going 25 mph and that was fast for me, I was in the slow lane and I am sure if the big trucks could have passed me - some of them would have.  Here is a pic off the Internet of the bridge:


Dartford Bridge, London
We also saw this sign on the bridge:

Chris and I thought that "escape lane" looked an awful lot like a shredder.
We finally got to the temple.  We settled in our room and since it was Monday the temple was closed so we just got to relax and walk around the temple here are some pictures:

It was HOT so we went out at night.
The next day we got to go to the temple and it was well worth the drive.  As Chris and I were sitting there we decided that instead of going home that night, we'd say til Friday afternoon.  Here are some more pictures:

Sunburn from the drive...                              In Crawley we found Air...

The lovely grounds...                                             The temple...

The temple grounds are on the Gatwick       Chris LONG eyelashes - and my camera work..
flight path that equals LOUD, low planes.
Come Friday Chris and I both didn't want to come back to March.  We had spent a week without computer, phones, TV, or anything.  We knew once we left the peace of the temple that we'd have to go back to the "real world".
On the way home we were stuck in traffic for at least an hour at the entrance to the Dartford Tunnel - much better than the bridge.  English drivers are crazy and we saw a lot of close calls as cars swerved in and out of traffic.

The rest of the ride home was uneventful - we did take a wrong turn, at which point Chris and I both said we didn't know where we were... we just turned around and found the high street to get out.  All the while, watching for elderly people... lol like the sign above shows.
We got home on Friday and then on Saturday went to the sea side with Chris friend, David and his girlfriend Clair - we went to Sandringham as well (pictures and post to follow).  We had a great time, despite the rain.
Sunday we went to church and have been moping around all week.  We had a great time away last week, but I guess it is back to reality.
More posting to come.

I know, I know... At Least I am Writing NOW

Hello everyone...
I know it has been ages since I last updated my blog, and I would use the excuse I am so busy - but that would be a bit of a lie - in fact, I have been busy... but looking back at the last few months there isn't much I can remember.  To save you a very, VERY long entry about all that has been going on I will do a bullet list with some explanations from the last time I wrote and if you have questions or want to know more just leave a comment - deal?

*  Summer in England is MISERABLE - 81* with a humidity level nearing that much as well, and I am sure you are thinking - turn on the air conditioner, which would be a great idea, if anyone here had one... in fact, yesterday at the doctors I was actually happy to be waiting for nearly 45 minutes just so I can be somewhere with an air conditioner.  To make things worse it gets light at 4:30 in the morning which leads to very early morning wake up calls.
*  At church we got finally got a building to meet in, a proper ward house, we start our meetings at 1:30.  That is fine, but the building is 45 minutes away so it makes for a long Sunday - but it is worth it just to have a building.
*  I did absolutely nothing on the 4th of July - except be homesick, of course.
*  I went and saw Sex and the City the day it opened her at the first showing and LOVED it.
*  I went to my first English wedding at the church next door (St. Peters) for a girl from work.  It was an absolutely lovely ceremony.  If you are interested I will tell you more... just ask...  But now I've done a wedding and a funeral here in England.
*  I went back to work after being off sick for a month, lasted 2 days before I gave my notice.  My last day of work was the 16th of June and, although I was doubting my decision about leaving, at the time, yesterday when I received a letter saying they were taking £500+ from my paycheck - I know I made the right decision to leave.
*  Chris and I had to get new tyres on the car because the front one was splitting sideways and were seriously bent... when I drove the steering wheel shook like crazy.  We got it fixed and plan on wearing out the tyres driving all over the country.
*  I learned this week that there are blessings for helping the missionaries - I got a lovely book from one Elders family, a Salt City Candle from another Elders mother, and now the most generous gift is that an Elders family, who is coming to pick him up, is paying for us to stay in London for a night with the family.  Score!
*  I started the gym about a month ago but couldn't hack going to work and the gym - light weight, I know - now that work is over I am going at it full throttle - it is HARD work.
*  We've had to be marriage counsellors for a couple in our branch.  It makes me and Chris very happy about the state of our marriage.
*  Back at home - Nic got in a motorcycle crash, Dad got in a bike crash, Tarra had her birthday, and Karissa graduated from high school - she is on her way to Maryland for school in the Autumn - I am proud of her.
*  My sister in law, Naomi, is pregnant.
*  Last weekend was the 2 year anniversary of me being here in England.  I have sent away to get my extended stay visa and am waiting for news.  To celebrate Chris and I went to a market in Ely.  It was rainy and sunny all day long - I found a beautiful quilt that I bought that will be one of those, we never use but show off quilts. 
*  Chris and I have decided that we will be moving back to Utah after his sisters wedding in January. Whoooo Hoooo!!

I will try to better, I promise....